Thursday, June 25, 2009
This week I decided to stop tip toeing around wrecking and jump in to really facing some of my places of resistance. I thought I was being very brave when I gessoed over my cover. I liked the cover and I liked the way I had decorated it so I felt a little sad about painting over it. But, I was also secretly thrilled. As crazy as it sounds - it felt daring. After it was gessoed I started to feel excited about the possibilities it opened up.
I quickly re-painted it the next day because I was on my way to the shore and wanted to take it with me. I figured I'd come this far - if I didn't like the way it turned out - I'd just paint over it again.
Once at the shore I kept looking at my journal staring up at me from the sand. A voice said - "Throw it in the ocean - that'll really wreck it." I didn't want to. I knew it WOULD wreck it. The pages would be water-logged, it might get ripped apart, it might be unuseable. I was feeling very attached to my friend, my journal.
MY POOR JOURNAL IN THE OCEAN!!
As I threw the journal in the ocean I felt very free but after I fished it out I felt a little sad. I wished I wouldn't have done it. It felt like a mistake. I spent the next day blow drying and ironing it (yes - I do know how crazy that sounds). I felt like it was just ruined and I didn't want to play anymore. But, I made the CHOICE to go ahead and do it anyway. I made the CHOICE to see what I could do with my waterlogged, taped together, stained and sandy journal. Sometimes things don't go as we plan. Sometimes we make what feel like mistakes. We can either let those moments paralyze us or we can choose to pick our taped-together selves up and see what else might lie ahead.
1. The Bashful Banana is one of my all time favorite restaurants. Everything is healthy and yummy. There are plenty of vegetarian and vegan choices which is great for me and the Banana Whip - delicious!! To top it all off, it's near the ocean. What could be better. Thanks Bashful Banana.
2. I have a card from Eric Maisel's card deck Everyday Creative on my piano at all times. Sometimes I change it everyday and sometimes I leave one on the piano to ponder for several days at a time.
3. I also have a card from Roger Von Oech's Creative Whack Pack on my piano at all times. These cards are GREAT for helping break my patterns of habitual thinking. The 64 cards are divided into four sixteen card suits: Explorer, Artist, Judge, and Warrior. These represent the four roles or types of thinking of the creative process. The cards can be used in several different ways but most often if I'm stuck I pull a card from the deck randomly. Works every time.
4. Susan G. Wooldridge's book, Poemcrazy, is highly motivating. It reminded me of my love of words and inspired me to start writing poetry again because now I see poems in everything.
5. I'm a latecomer to most things blogger and picnik.com is yet another one of those things. I've just started exploring and I love all the fun funky things you can do with photos.
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
Sunday, June 21, 2009
In one scene my castmate, Joanne, had to eat a breadstick. She was slightly stressed about it. It was a hard scene to start with, her character carried the scene and flitted from topic to topic. It required a great deal of concentration and the whole idea of adding food to the mix was a little overwhelming to Joanne. She solved her problem by taking just the tiniest little nibble of the breadstick. Then one night in performance the worst happened. The breadstick SNAPPED, breadcrumbs flew all over and Joanne was stuck with a mouthful of breadstick. She could have crumbled but because she had done all of her creative homework - it just opened the floodgate - she completely embraced it and suddenly she just relaxed and was able to really settle into the character. It was a great reminder of how facing our fears can open doors.
Like everyone, I frequently question whether I'm good enough to be doing what I'm doing and I wonder if what I'm doing has any relevance. Today we had a tiny, quiet audience but at the end of the show one sweet older woman stood up to give us a standing ovation. And, I thought, "That's enough. If all I did was move one person - that's enough. I'm in the place I am meant to be."
I'm also reminded of how one creative endeavor leads to the next. The cycle continues. Even as Heidi closes, I've been approach by two separate people regarding two very interesting projects. BUT, for now it's time to re-set, restore and re-stock the pond.
Friday, June 19, 2009
I thought it was funny that as I was writing last week about my inhibitions in the destruction of my journal, my 12 year old daughter was behind me engrossed in this project. She was supposed to be getting ready for ballet class but she took the little piece of white cardboard out of the packaging of her tights and began to draw on it with make-up, nail polish and hand sanitizer - just the things that she had on hand. Here I was fretting about my capabilities and I am apparently living with a wrecking-zen master.
So, I enlisted her help on some of my other endeavors. Needless to say, she has had some excellent ideas about how to wreck!!
She thought to add the ears & tail to the journal so it looked like a creature and she also suggested I wear a cowgirl hat.
I'm including some photos of some of the other wrecking done this week. I "scrubbed" the page with a Mr. Eraser and made star shapes, ripped some strips and doodled & cut the edges among other things.
Thursday, June 18, 2009
2. This Pritt Ad is great. Watch Michael C. Place take a work of art from concept to finish.
3. I adore this website - a wonderful, whimsical combination of animation & sound (and it's just plain fun). Be sure to move your mouse once the music starts.
4. I like to play here, too. Zefrank's website is full of humor and delight.
Friday, June 12, 2009
My webcam cut me off at the end but all I said was I will eventually get to you all - this week has been insanely busy but now that my show has opened I will have more time. I look forward to everyone's continued wrecking!!
I nearly forgot - when I was doodling on the front cover I was playing with paint pens and one of them broke apart spilling yellow paint all over me. So, I feel I get bonus points because I also wrecked a pair of pants :)
Thursday, June 11, 2009
1. I love these purple Bic Velocity ball point pens. Purple is my favorite color and using this as my everyday pen is a great way to add my own personal flair to everything and bring a little more color into my life!
2. The Bach Cello Suites played by Yo-Yo Ma the artistry and creativity is breath-taking.
3. Creative Paint Workshop for Mixed Media Artists by Ann Baldwin. I just bought this and am so looking forward to working with it. I've long been looking for a book like this that sort of lays things out step-by-step. Many other books of this genre are written for someone who already has an art background. And although this has a great deal to say to those folks - it's also perfect for me, whose last art class was in the 4th grade when the art teacher throw a chalkboard eraser at one of my classmates for drawing a tree "wrong."
4. In Treatment - if you haven't already seen this HBO series treat yourself and have a look. The acting is superb!!!
5. Come join the fun on Jamie Ridler's Blog and start wrecking. We're "reading" Kerri Smith's Wreck This Journal.
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
Monday, June 8, 2009
This passage from Uta Hagen’s A Challenge for the Actor really resonates with me. I frequently find myself in the “good student” mode, focused on “doing “ - and doing it perfectly. Being a woman, I also frequently focus on giving. It is hard for me to receive. It never comes from a lack of confidence in my fellow actors but from a lack of confidence in myself. I always want to be sure that what I am “sending” is good . I still struggle with trusting myself enough to just open to what’s there and responding with my intuition. If I’m busy planning my next move - how can I be open to what is happening NOW? You must RECEIVE before you can SEND. I am going to make tonight’s rehearsal about applying this principle.
Saturday, June 6, 2009
I'm lifting this idea from Christine Mason Miller's blog, Swirly Girl. I like the idea of deliberately looking for inspiration, expanding horizons and sharing discoveries. So here are my five things with Christine's blog being a bonus number 6!!
My own little place to explore my creativity and imagination